psycho nappy cinema

Ashaka Cohen

November 23, 2009 at 10:58 am | In wtf files | Leave a Comment

Top ’00s (2003): City of God

November 22, 2009 at 1:20 am | In City of God, Year: 2003 films, top of the '00s | Leave a Comment

I’m sure you’ve seen Fernando Meirelles’s opus CITY OF GOD at least a couple of times. So there’s probably no need to explain that the film tells a hyperkinetic tale of drugs and violence strong-armed by the baddest, murderous adolescents in a favela known as City of God. I’m sure you know all about the spectacular cinematography – from the sepia tones of the 60s to the grittiness of the 80s. You’ve probably seen clips of that infamous chicken that knew when to escape when the humans around it didn’t. No need to get into the doomed romances ending in gunshots, right before lovers attempt to flee the craziness. Or the strobe-lit murder and separation of two friends at a dancehall. So I wont get into all that.

From a female point of view, I’ll tell you why I love this film – I’m fascinated by the male relationships. Male rule, run amok, without female counterbalance is no joke. The absence of female voices anywhere is truly dangerous. We see it in Killadelphia, Darfur….in the slums of Rio de Janeiro, manhood is defined by smoking, snorting and snuffing, often by prepubescents who will never reach eighteen. That eighteenth birthday seems to be a curious age, especially for a drug lord like L’il Ze (Leandro Firmino). In CITY OF GOD, we see how the real threat of manhood – not the guns or the drugs – challenge him and provoke him in ways previously untested. It’s not like true adults are there to guide Ze; they are nonexistent in his world. And the ones around him who seem to get a clue, get killed right before they leave.

City-of-God

The crux of L’il Ze’s passionate conflicts seem to be envy…a theme that is very feminine in nature. Here, his emotions are flavored with bullets and blood. It’s interesting to see a film that actually goes to that place…combining the masculine and the feminine.

L’il Ze’s lust to kill masks his deficiencies. Ironically, it all began at a brothel as a young boy when he kills for kicks. Poor Ze…he’s not good looking and he lacks confidence with women, and so he seems to put all his energy into being fearsome. He’s not like his friend Benny – the likeable, bleach-blonde hipster…the popular guy with both guys and girls. The guy is even popular amongst the rival gang led by L’il Ze’s rival, Carrot. Unlike Benny, L’il Ze has no soul, but we see glimpses of his humanity when we realize his incapacitations. Eighteen presents problems: girls. As a respected drug lord, L’il Ze is a complete failure with women. Your heart almost breaks for him. While his friend Benny has no problem with the ladies, he struggles.

One girl, Angelica, tests L’il Ze and Benny’s legendary friendship. She not only threatens their childhood bond, but her love for Benny convinces him to go on to the next stage of life, put down the guns, and leave the favela for a swinging, pot-filled, carefree life on a farm. All this is totally disorienting for L’il Ze. So much so, his possessiveness unintentionally triggers his permanent separation from Benny.

Ze’s envy also gets the best of him when he realizes he doesn’t have the rugged handsomeness of Knockout Ned. With gun waived, Ze makes him strip naked on the dance floor in front of his girlfriend to take him down a notch. This conflict fuels a never-ending feud after L’il Ze rapes Ned’s girlfriend and kills some of his family members. L’il Ze is even pissed off when Knockout Ned’s snapshot appears in the newspaper, when he believes himself to be the rightful kingpin of their favela. We all know top dogs should be photographed, not lightweights like Ned!!!

L’il Ze commissions Rocket to do the photoshoot (of all photoshoots) to put Ned in his place. Rocket is the opposite of L’il Ze. He has problems with girls too, but instead of shooting guns, he shoots photos and it actually takes him out of the poverty and violence so many of his peers succumb to. After taking L’il Ze’s photograph (which makes page one of the newspaper), his career as a reporter is borne.

L’il Ze is not so lucky. After all, turning eighteen is problematic. Death is around every corner at such an old age. Ze’s death rightfully belongs to the next round of little hooligans – the Runts (9 and 10 year olds). There’s no need to wait for some old guy to croak for the cycle to continue.

And this craziness is the reason CITY OF GOD is 2003’s Top of the ‘00s, for me.

Princess invisible…

November 19, 2009 at 9:09 pm | In The Princess & the Frog, euro standards of beauty, fat black and female | Leave a Comment

Has anyone noticed the princess disappearing in each successive advertisement of THE PRINCESS AND THE FROG? In the newest ad, Tiana (in human form) appears in a whopping 2 seconds of a 30 second ad (in her own film.) I guess Disney believes they can’t sell the film with a beautiful black female lead. Too unrealistic. We know black women aren’t pretty enough to be princesses. So Disney is relying on the more stereotypical standby, namely the older mammy character to bring the laughs. When in doubt, the fat black woman will bring in major bank. Just ask Tyler Perry, Martin Lawrence and Jamie Foxx.

Baby Lacefront

November 19, 2009 at 7:09 pm | In baby lacefront | Leave a Comment

It’s never to early to instill lifelong hatred -

me, lately = this song, on a loop

November 11, 2009 at 7:04 pm | In Boards of Canada, depression | Leave a Comment

NEWSFLASH: we’re still mammies on soaps

November 10, 2009 at 11:00 am | In One Life to Live, black women, soap operas | 1 Comment

Rarely are black women graced with long-term storylines with the same possibilities as their white counterparts on daytime dramas. There are no sweeping romances. No big gala weddings and marriages. Black women still function as ‘mammy’ or ‘fill-in’ until the next big-white-storyline ramps up. ABC’s One Life to Live is no exception. There’s so much ridiculousness on this show to sort through, I’ll have to limit myself to the two characters who annoy me the most.

‘Destiny Evans’

‘Destiny Evans’ is a heavy-set teen whose only role on the show is to mammy Matthew, who is bound to a wheelchair. The girl is permanently on-call and seems to pop-up out of nowhere to attend to his needs. She might as well be his personal nurse or nanny. Of course, she has no needs of her own.

Even though Matthew’s family members are millionaires and can afford to take care of his needs, Destiny, who is a high school student, regularly buys Matthew stuff, like sneakers. She even flies to London to visit him without her parents’ permission. She regularly gallivants all over the globe on his behalf, while he does nothing to reciprocate. Destiny even willed Matthew’s corrective surgery into existence. She was the one who found a top-notch doctor to perform it AND a lawyer to sue his parents to declare his independence, so he could have the surgery. The girl has skills!

Just when Destiny realizes she’s drawn to Matthew romantically, his parents suddenly whisk him off to boarding school so there is no chance of pursuing a relationship. This is a common OLTL plot-device to create the illusion that black women are as embroiled in soapy relationships, like everyone else. But, if you look closely, you’ll notice a pattern of quitting just before anything real happens. The network pulls back (to placate the larger white audience) separating the love interests by distance, coma, death, and other unfortunate situations.

I expect Destiny to be sidelined as soon as Matthew takes his first steps. Seriously, there’s no need for her to exist otherwise.

‘Lola Williamson’

“Lola Williamson’ was brought in as Evangeline’s sister. Lola was an actress when she came to town, but her career was highly dependent on the major plotline shifts of the white characters. So far, she’s been an actress, waitressed at a bar, worked in a police station, and was the co-owner of an internationally known lingerie company. She mammies by being the dependable ‘best black friend’ to whomever shows up. Lola’s romantic storylines were all off-screen in the past and very brief…going from dating to complaining about bad sex quickly.

Oddly enough, after years of nothing, Lola was thrust front-and-center in a relationship this year. Well, not really. You see, it was a fake-relationship to highlight THE BIG GAY STORYLINE between Oliver and Kyle, and larger storyline about gay marriage. I find it ironic the network is pretending to be progressive, shining a light on one oppression, while consistently marginalizing black women.

Anyway, Lola dates a down-low cop named ‘Oliver Fish.’ (Really.) When her male roommate, Christian, finds out Oliver’s secretly gay, he does absolutely nothing, even though he knew they were planning to sleep together that same night, with Lola believing Oliver is a straight man. And Christian supposedly fancies her! As the story unfolds (way after the sex), she finds out Oliver is gay. There is no conversation about her feelings of betrayal. Lola immediately goes into mammy-mode and concerns herself with his feelings, and what a burden it was for him to keep his secret. Her feelings were never addressed. We all know ’strong black women’ bounce back instantaneously and ‘keep it moving.’ No need to get emotional or anything…

Somehow, I can’t see this very creepy storyline written for the white, whiny and well-doted-on, ‘Jessica Buchanan.’

RACE

November 3, 2009 at 7:27 pm | In David Mamet, Race | Leave a Comment

It’s opening for previews on Sunday and I can’t find any real info on this show.

Two months left…

November 3, 2009 at 12:45 pm | In Year: 2009 films, making films | Leave a Comment

…to see the rest of this year’s films. I have to admit, not much peaked my interest that I’d be so compelled to rush out and view them.

In all honesty, the current film releases cannot compare to the ones I really feel passionate about – the unmade ones in my head. It truly sucks wanting to make a film and not having the resources to make it exactly the way I feel I must. I know a lot of folks (who don’t make films themselves) will say, see, PARANORMAL ACTIVITY was made for $$$, so you too can make your film for $$$ instead of $$$$$$$. Seriously, I just want to shoot these pollyannas. They will take the extreme ‘blair witch’ example that comes around every 10 years or so and hold up it to your face to make you feel like you’re not doing enough. It’s like saying, Barack Obama is president, so what the hell is wrong with you that you can’t become president too? No one seems to take into consideration that different films are different, and while it’s appropriate to make a dark video-thriller for $$$, that money will do nothing for a dreary dystopian love story.

And really… it’s not about money. It’s about so many other variables. The work I do is the antithesis of what most investors find valuable in black cinema. I don’t make ‘positive’ black films with problemless black folk. I’m not interested in black people looking perfect, weave-ilicious, and glossy. I’m not interested in projecting an uber-successful image to make up for decades of downtrodden images. I’m not interested in conventional black folk in any way, shape or form. They are just as annoying as conventional white folk, with their boring plans laid out before them.

I get upset when I see folks supporting the same uninteresting, regurgitated crap that I find unnecessary. But most people in this world are comfortable with the ‘unnecessary’ and familiar. Lord only knows what would happen if they had to view material that upset them or made them feel or think too much. I despise the cinematically complacent. They annoy the hell out of me.

Anyway, this is left on my list to see this year (red = the films I’ve seen) -

Why isn’t this a bigger deal?

November 2, 2009 at 1:07 am | In NYC 2009 Marathon | Leave a Comment

Two black people win the NYC 2009 Marathon. Meb Keflezighi, 34, is the first AMERICAN since 1982 to win the New York City Marathon. Derartu Tulu, 37, from Ethiopia, wins the women’s division. Good for them.

Blondie gone Blackie

October 30, 2009 at 11:04 pm | In Blondie, Who Shot Rock & Roll | Leave a Comment

Honestly, the voice was the voice, but even up close, the person in front of me did not look like Debbie Harry from Blondie at all. It wasn’t even the brunette wig. I dunno. I laughed when she sang Michael Jackson’s “Dont’ Stop ‘Til You Get Enough’ like it was “The Tide is High.” Hilarious I tell ya!

Here are pics from last night’s Who Shot Rock & Roll preview party at the Brooklyn Museum. I love old time rock -n- rollers. Everybody had a great drunken story about some concert they went to. If you love music get to this exhibit, pronto. Lots of good stuff. Especially in the Rock ‘n’ Roll gift shop.
Who-Shot-1 Who-Shot-2 Who-Shot-4 Who-Shot-5 Who-Shot-6 Who-Shot-7 Who-Shot-8 Who-Shot-9 Who-Shot-10

Sapphire speaks…

October 29, 2009 at 2:05 am | In Gabourey Sidibe, Lee Daniels, Precious, Push, Sapphire, fat black and female | Leave a Comment

It’s weird who I’ve crossed paths with in my life. I could easily rattle off a collection of radically different people in different places. Somewhere in the late ’90s, I remember sitting in a room with a bunch of white women and one other black woman – Sapphire – discussing body image & eating disorders…with us black women strongly asserting that YES, black women are prone to eating disorders, too.

It’s interesting to hear her thoughts now about overweight black women and exploitation…especially on film.

Lincoln – Sia – The Church – Zero 7

October 27, 2009 at 12:57 am | In Mozez, Sia, The Church, Zero 7, advertisements | 2 Comments

When I accidentally hear a familiar song refashioned so well while flipping channels, I have to stop everything. Check this Lincoln ad out -

Yup, Under the Milky Way. Sung by Sia. There’s even a free download available.

Love it, but nothing beats the original track from The Church. From back in 1988. Steve Kilbey is one of the unsung heroes from that era. Seriously, The Church should have been what U2 is, but their lyrics are a little too esoteric and folks tend to tune out. I see them every time they’re in NYC…most recently, last summer. Unfortunately the hipsters have discovered them. Ick.

The merge between The Church from the ’80s and Zero 7 from the ’00s is too delicious for words. Sia is only one of the two voices of Zero 7. The other is Mozez. Mozez is heaven. He can make you cry for no other reason than the sheer pleasure of listening to his voice. Hopefully, both of them will show up when Zero 7 performs this November. Here’s Sia in Distractions -

Heck, here’s Mozez singing Over Our Heads -

Dolls with ‘locks & TWAs…

October 26, 2009 at 6:08 pm | In black dolls, black women | 2 Comments

doll10 Barbie repaint by vbyers1.

repaint362b by vbyers1. repaint417b by vbyers1.

Dolls of the World Princess of South Africa Barbie by vbyers1. repaint212b by vbyers1.

repaint324b by vbyers1. doll1

from Tabloach.com

Tyler Perry is pissed off

October 26, 2009 at 1:28 am | In Tyler Perry | Leave a Comment

So I just saw Tyler Perry on 60 Minutes. He came off as he always does – a disingenuous, opportunistic, defensive, charlatan selling his latest, lamest flick. My favorite part -

Spike Lee: I think there is a lot of stuff out there that is coonery and buffoonery. I see ads for Meet the Browns and House of Payne and I’m scratching my head. We got a black president and we’re going back. The image is troubling and it harkens back to Amos ‘n’ Andy.

Tyler Perry: I would love to read that to my fan base. Let me tell you what Madea, Brown..all these characters are bait. Disarming, charming, make you laugh bait, so I can slap Madea in something and talk about god, love, faith, forgiveness, family, any of those things. You know? You know that pisses me off. It’s really does. Because it’s so insulting. It’s attitudes that, that make Hollywood think that these people do not exist and that’s why there’s no material speaking to them, speaking to us.

So Madea is bait. Put a black man in a female fat suit and black people will come running with dollars in hand to see a film. Tyler Perry may be right about that, given that it’s a formula that’s worked time-and-time-again. His goal is to pander to the lowest common denominator. He wants to entertain without engaging the mind and heart in an intellectual manner. I believe the role of cinema is to get folks to think deeply about their existence on this earth. I could almost tolerate Madea on occasion if there was some balance in black cinema. Right now there is none.

In a typical bizarre coincidence I must share that I found myself in an elevator with Robin Williams last week. The first thing that sprung into my head was NOT Ms. Doubtfire. Instead I thought of films like ONE HOUR PHOTO, AWAKENINGS, DEAD POETS SOCIETY. Mork & Mindy. Tyler Perry is a multi-millionaire who owns his own film & television studio and has major notoriety in the film industry. If he wanted to walk away from Madea to create more meaningful films he could do that. He could recruit a whole team of auteurs, invest a little, get a lot, and build a new brand. The sad reality is Tyler Perry chooses to limit himself, even when his survival doesn’t depend on Madea.

SNL:10 reasons to hire a black actress

October 21, 2009 at 12:43 am | In SNL, black actresses | 1 Comment

I’m too cheap for cable and my DTV doesn’t work on NBC. But occassionally I still see Saturday Night Live clips on Hulu. I don’t understand why in this day and age black women don’t exist on SNL. There are too many notable black women in the media this year to have fun with, namely -

Oprah Winfrey, LaToya Jackson, Whoopi Goldberg, Sherri Shepherd, Rihanna

Nene Leakes, Mo’Nique, Tyra Banks, Wendy Williams, Michelle Obama

OK Cupid profile pic updated, again…

October 19, 2009 at 6:44 pm | In Your Race Affects Whether People Write You Back, black women, euro standards of beauty, propaganda | Leave a Comment

My reign of terror continues against my fellow OKCupids out there looking for love. Seems I’m making someone a little uncomfortable, since they insist on reporting me for posting a fake photo of myself. Well, since I am just a lowly BLACK WOMAN, how on earth could anyone tell the difference between me and Godzilla? Apparently black women are fire-breathing monsters. I thought OKStupids would welcome a fancy pic like this. I think I look ssssmashing!!!

Top ’00s (2002): Songs From the Second Floor

October 17, 2009 at 7:04 pm | In Roy Andersson, Songs from the Second Floor, Year: 2002 films, top of the '00s | Leave a Comment

songs 5 A running joke in my household growing up was that my father owned clothes older than me, and that someday they’d outlast the entire family. Even today, when I return home for the obligatory holiday dinner, he will point to his dress-shirts made by some London haberdasher millions of years ago, and proudly proclaim that not a single button has ever had to be re-sewn.

songs 6

Today clothes are purchased with the buttons practically falling off, with the expectation that the shirt will survive maybe a season or two before it disintegrates. No need for repair. To the dump it goes. We live in a disposable culture. Everything is replaced by a new model. We can easily be replaced. Our excesses rapidly fill-up landfills with disposable things and disposable people. It’s just the attitude of the day.

songsfromthe2floor_4_160620

Capitalists are the only winners, and they’re getting out of dodge with their damned golf clubs before all hell breaks loose. Their old tried-and-true formulas no longer work anymore. The company that employed a working stiff for 30 years can suddenly keep the cogs a-turning without them. The magic tricks once performed on the economy, now fail miserably.

songs1

What do we do in times of loneliness, despair, and financial upheaval? Pray?? Hell no. Religious leaders most likely invested in the mayhem. The clergy, the politicians, and the corporate svengalis alike, have orchestrated this misery and have sacrificed the youth to the god that is Capitalism.

songs 3

The only reason to turn to religion is to make cash-money. If Jesus Christ himself aka “the pathetic loser,” fails to turn a quick buck, even he is carted off and disposed of at the nearest city dump. Those still standing will be slowly haunted by the gloominess of their decimated cities.

songs1

Welcome to Roy Andersson’s world – the writer and director of SONGS FROM THE SECOND FLOOR, the very best film of the ’00s (Top of the ’00s). Roy Andersson takes a painterly approach to filmmaking, wiping his frames with a putrid shade of grey, someplace in Sweden, which seems to be overpopulated with obese characters dipped in Gold Medal flour. Andersson constructs these scenes right out of his commercial studio….a studio ironically funded by the same capitalists he derides in every single one of his films. Instead of going to a train station, airport or busy city intersection to film scenes, Andersson chooses instead to create it from scratch out of wood and paint.

Songs 2

SONGS FROM THE SECOND FLOOR is literally 46 frames of still, immoveable magic, that is simply breathtaking. As the film unfolds, we are taken into rooms, connected to other rooms showing off an impressive depth of field. No other film this decade has said more about financial collapse and the absurdity of human emptiness in a soulless capitalist society about to run off a cliff.

OK Cupid profile pic updated…

October 15, 2009 at 8:35 pm | In Your Race Affects Whether People Write You Back, black women, euro standards of beauty, propaganda | Leave a Comment

gorilla …to this! And I’ve received an INSANE amount of page views since uploading it!!! I think it suits me, since black women, according to OK Cupid, are -

fat

aggressive

on display to be studied like wildlife

subhuman

en route to becoming an endangered species

‘Brilliantly Cartoonish’

October 12, 2009 at 11:33 pm | In Chris Rock, Good Hair, Your Race Affects Whether People Write You Back, black women, euro standards of beauty, life, propaganda | Leave a Comment

French Vogue is, also, not Italian Vogue. But imagine a world where white women like model Lara Stone, below, are expected to ‘blacken-up’ to be considered beautiful and worthy of all the finer things in life.

french-vogue-blackface

Imagine that white women are expected to wear one of these just to keep a job, to seem decent and lovable and feminine, to fit in with society. It would seem CARTOONISH wouldn’t it? Women’s Wear Daily thinks so -

Jacobs went for head-to-toe overstatement — literally, from Guido Palau’s brilliantly cartoonish Afros…

afro

Good thing for white women, they don’t live in that world. White women don’t feel compelled to conform to standards that aren’t of their own race.

The majority of black women, as demonstrated in Chris Rock’s horribly unenven film, GOOD HAIR, do. Seems they must relax/wig/weave/extend their hair to become acceptable, attractive, employable, marriageable human beings, in a world that propagandizes white female beauty. In many countries, bleaching is just as prevalent.

Isn’t it just as ‘cartoonish’ when black women subject themselves to this lifelong beauty standard?

cartoonish

As I gaze up into the wisteria, I wonder how I ever managed to get through life with nappy hair and dark skin…and while I’m at it…a fat body, a bad attitude, and an occasionally raised voice (for emphasis)? After all, black women like myself MUST be hated and dismissed, as evidenced by surveys like Your Race Affects Whether People Write You Back…a survey I feel compelled to mention again for some reason.

As hard as it is to be me, I can honestly say, I’d rather be myself than anybody else. Actually I don’t know how to be such a contortionist and charlatan, that I willingly bend myself to the whims of other people. I know I’ve suffered TREMENDOUSLY as a result. I regularly cry about feeling at odds with the world. But, living on my terms is more important to me than being rewarded for being acceptable to others.

happiness | unhappy | happy

October 10, 2009 at 2:47 pm | In Chris Rock, Good Hair, Happiness, Lars Von Trier, Life During Wartime, Oprah Winfrey, Todd Solondz, Tyra Banks | Leave a Comment

HAPPINESS

Hmm…

Should I re-watch Todd Solondz’s HAPPINESS, before or after I see LIFE DURING WARTIME? We’ll see.

UNHAPPY

Besides being horribly sick, I’ve been generally upset by all the exploitationists looking to make a buck off of black women. (Chris Rock, this means you!!!) I saw GOOD HAIR yesterday, and honestly I should have stayed home, because I was annoyed enough by his discussions with both Oprah and Tyra.

There are zero attempts by Rock to talk about alternatives to relaxed/weaved/wigged hair. The only time he mentions natural hair is to make fun of it. (Then he has the NERVE to wonder why his little girls have a complex about their hair.) Rock paints women who attain straight hair through other means as narcissistic spend-thrifts. There’s no discussion on why black people feel compelled to ruin their natural hair in the first place. The d-list celebrities interviewed were just plain-dumb. And of course, black men seem to get off scot-free…including Rock who never asks himself why he chose a mate who wears a weave. This is one half-assed film meant to entertain without getting into discussions about beauty & white supremacy.

Reply-By-Race-Female

Speaking of beauty & white supremacy, I have no idea why I was so affected by OKCupid’s: Your Race Affects Whether People Write You Back study, given that I experience this shit everyday, and why I’ve given up on trying to date online. Very depressing results for black women. If you can read the whole piece, do. In the meantime, I’ll continue to inhabit my own planet…and I may even watch NASA as it bombs the moon.

GREEN = strong preference, YELLOW = neutral, RED = little preference

Lars-von-Trier HAPPY

Speaking of planets, this is what Lars Von Trier said of his upcoming film, PLANET MELANCHOLIA, a psychological disaster sci-fi flick:

”No more happy endings!”

Finally! Something to smile about!

missing pieces…

October 8, 2009 at 1:21 pm | In love, writing, ‘I’m a successful educated black woman’ | Leave a Comment

educated black woman

I’m an inconsistent writer, going at it when the mood strikes. I wish I were one of those disciplined souls who can knock out five pages everyday. Right now I’m stressed about money and depressed about life in general, so it’s more difficult to do anything consistently. But I’m trying. Progress, not perfection, right?

I’ve been sitting on the next scene of this screenplay, forever. I want to get it right. I want it to mean something, because ultimately it must highlight some misery I’ve experienced. This time it’s about love, or the lack thereof. Black women rarely get the love they desire, especially if they have standards.

I realize black women often get what is in their power to get, and then convince themselves that’s all they wanted in the first place. For example, a college degree is simple to get; an ordinary professional career is obtainable. It is within anyone’s power who desires to learn. It doesn’t take much ingenuity or treading on unworn territory. It doesn’t require you to mold yourself with another person who’s similarly molding himself to accommodate you. It doesn’t make your insides burn.

I secretly think the shame of not having much else is the reason black women harp on the ‘I’m a successful, educated, black woman’ thing. It’s to divert their attention from the hole in their lives that love should occupy.

There’s no reason to write unless the darn thing is the truth. The truth is, black women cloak their loneliness in a lot of bravado. To the untrained eye, it may seem like contentedness, but there are some of us who can see the cracks in the facade. So I’m busy poking at that sore. And I want it to hurt badly. I don’t want it to be cute, quirky or hopeful, because in real life ‘quirky’ rarely happens for black women. Especially in matters of the heart.

Will she give up chocolate?

October 6, 2009 at 10:03 am | In Lisa Lampanelli | Leave a Comment

Now that Lisa’s marrying a white dude will she give up chocolate? I think not!

LisaLampanelli

PRECIOUS: my thoughts

October 4, 2009 at 12:57 pm | In Gabourey Sidibe, Lee Daniels, Michael Jackson, New York FIlm Festival, Precious, Year: 2009 films, fat black and female | Leave a Comment

I was expecting to be moved. I wanted ‘emotional weight’ that was at least as heavy as Claireece ‘Precious’ Jones herself. If not that, I expected to hate my beloved Lee Daniels with a passion, for getting the story wrong.

But here I remain unaffected, trying to figure out why the shockingly-obese Claireece, filling-up the entire screen with her poundage, created little charge in me.

Being an overweight black woman myself, I’ve experienced the same things as Claireece…no, not sexual abuse, incest, illiteracy, teen-pregnancy, poverty, physical abuse or AIDS…more like, neglect, rejection, and lowered-expectations. This film could easily be made without Claireese’s horrors and it would still be a valid film about the dehumanization of black women. It seems the only way to empathize with someone of Claireese’s hue and size is to amp-up the external catastrophes, at the expense of her internal destruction. Yes, I do realize this film is based on Sapphire’s novel Push, but the adaptation is somewhat exploitative, without delving deeply into Claireese’s psychological development.

As I sat, long after the credits rolled in Alice Tully Hall at the New York Film Festival, listening to some white folks in front of me saying it was the best movie, blah, blah, blah…commentary that’s been echoed before at other film fests, I wondered about the real source of their appreciation for PRECIOUS.

Heck. I’m gonna say it. This widespread adoration reeks of white guilt. I realize it’s much easier for white people to embrace black films where they don’t have to assume any responsibility for the fuck-uptedness of the main characters. It’s much easier to take the blame-Joe-Jackson-approach and pretend Joe was the sole villain who distorted Michael Jackson’s perception of himself, which led to much of his unhappiness in his short life. No need to call out institutional racism, caucasoid-propagandism, or white rape & neglect.

Likewise, I suppose it’s that much easier to see flashes of this poor child raped by her father and her mother without wondering who raped them. And their parents and ancestors. Or wonder who psychologically raped them and made them hate themselves and their offspring so much. Marys and Claireeces don’t just pop out of thin air. For at least 400 years, they’ve been manufactured out of hate, and in turn they hate themselves and pass it along to their children.

But hey. Out of sight out of mind. No need to travel down that uncomfortable and bumpy road. I can see now why PRECIOUS is so ‘embraceable’ by the urban, white liberal elite. Even with all the greasiness and sweatiness.

Don’t get me wrong. The gritty-realism of this film was memorable. There are close-ups of Mo’Nique as Mary that will be permanently etched in my brain. And looking into Claireece’s (Gabourey Sidibe) face as she navigates her life, is truly heartbreaking. Given Lee Daniels’s track record of bringing something fresh and artistic to the table, I would say, for me, PRECIOUS is an unsatisfying departure…but, oddly enough, his most accessible film.

I guess this is a good thing for Daniels. It may even win him a coveted Academy Award for directing…and trust me, he deserves it given the array of brilliant performances he managed to squeeze out of not only Mo’Nique and newcomer, Gabourey Sidibe – but Mariah Carey, Sherri Sheppard, Lenny Kravitz, and the ensemble cast of young women in the Each One/Teach One classroom.

And if he does win it, I will be there cheering him on, even though PRECIOUS wasn’t what I had in mind.

pointy things | bushy eyebrows

September 30, 2009 at 11:38 am | In Aki Kaurismäki, alternate movie experiences | Leave a Comment

She’s fat, black, & female, so NATURALLY…

September 29, 2009 at 5:11 pm | In Gabourey Sidibe, Precious, black people you always see, black people you never see, fat black and female | Leave a Comment

gabbysidibe …she be MUST be downtrodden, illiterate, uneducated, sexually-abused, incested, impregnated…

Groan.

Apparently, folks who have seen the film, PRECIOUS, have stated it’s like a ‘documentary,’ it seems ’so real,’ therefore Gabourey Sidibe couldn’t possibly be acting.

Oh brother.

I totally get why Sidibe is annoyed. Fatness + blackness + femaleness usually means TRIPLE the stereotypes.

New neighbors…

September 29, 2009 at 12:23 pm | In Beyonce & Jay-Z, Bjork, Brooklyn | Leave a Comment

As long as you don’t block up my sidewalk with a two-baby stroller, we’re cool my Icelandic sister from another mother! Brooklyn welcomes you.

(Is that Michael & his brothers on her mantle…I mean ‘hospital trolley/disco thing?’)

________________________

Meanwhile, at the glass house down the street, it seems Beyonce & Jay-Z’s unconfirmed digs remains half-empty and curtainless.
meier building

Why isn’t Gabourey Sidibe on a media blitz?

September 27, 2009 at 10:36 am | In Precious, black people you never see | 1 Comment

precious-butterfly

Previous ‘IT’ girls like Anne Hathaway, Scarlett Johanson, Keira Knightley, & Natalie Portman have all enjoyed plenty of coverage in fashion/entertainment magazines after their breakout roles.

Why not Gabourey Sidibe?

Well…let’s see…she’s not white, skinny or blonde. She’s black, obese and dark-skinned. I suppose it is THAT much harder for Vogue to whip-up some whimsical fashion shoot, given what they have to work with…

The voice, never the look…

September 26, 2009 at 1:35 am | In Billie Holiday, advertisements, black people you never see | Leave a Comment

Beauty & fragrance advertisers have no problem using black women as ‘the voice’ of their ads. But would they ever consider one as the ‘desirable love interest?’ As much as I adore this Chanel No. 5 ad, it would be a thousand times more seductive if they used the ethereal and everlasting presence of Billie Holiday.

black man before white woman?

September 24, 2009 at 8:15 pm | In Academy Awards, Bright Star, Jane Campion, Kathryn Bigelow, Lee Daniels, Precious, The Hurt Locker, Year: 2009 films | 2 Comments

In the 81 year history of the Oscars, no woman and no African-American has ever won the two top categories. I have a strong feeling next year it will happen. Only Lina Wertmuller (SEVEN BEAUTIES) in 1976, Jane Campion (THE PIANO) in 1993, Sophia Coppola (LOST IN TRANSLATION) in 2003, and John Singleton (BOYZ IN THE HOOD) in 1991, have been nominated in the Best Directing category. Yup. Just four measly nominations in eighty-one years.

Seems a black man or a white woman may win the Academy Award for Best Directing and/or Best Picture in 2010 – Jane Campion for BRIGHT STAR, Kathryn Bigelow for THE HURT LOCKER, or Lee Daniels for PRECIOUS.

Black men received the right to vote in the U.S. before white women. A black man was elected to the U.S. Presidency before a white woman. Will a black man win the major film awards before a white woman? If history repeats itself, those awards might just belong to Lee Daniels. We’ll see..

Japanese Bazaar is not Italian Vogue

September 22, 2009 at 10:26 pm | In Michelle Obama | 2 Comments

This is how Japanese BAZAAR sees our first lady -

500x_japanbazaarDOLLtwo092209

3 Reasons Black Women Dread PRECIOUS

September 20, 2009 at 10:00 pm | In Lee Daniels, Precious, Tyler Perry, Year: 2009 films, fat, fat black and female | Leave a Comment

precious poster My precious PRECIOUS has so much going for it. No other film has garnered such unilateral positive press and praise from film fests and critics. Next year’s Oscars may be one for the books. Lee Daniels might be the first black director to win Best Directing and Best Film awards. Not only that, we may get not one, but two, possibly three black actresses from the same film nominated in the top categories – Gabourey Sidibe for Best Actress and Mo’Nique and Mariah Carey for Best Supporting Actresses. Plus, television and film juggernauts Oprah Winfrey and Tyler Perry are solidly behind PRECIOUS, even going as far as Executive Producing the film.

That said…for the most part…I believe black women will stay home when the film opens. Yes, I know. Seems unbelievable, but hear me out.

I’ve been excited about PRECIOUS forever. Given Lee Daniels’s glorious body of work, I knew it would be a thing to behold. I felt like a fairy, wanting to sprinkle the dust of all things good from PRECIOUS, but to my surprise, I’ve noticed plenty resistance from black women. As much as I want it to succeed, there are those who won’t support it. Why?

precious

1. Fat bodies and dark skin – Some black women have expressed they will not support a film starring an obese black actress, so dark, she seems ‘extreme.’ Yet they never complain when Halle Berry and Beyonce are shuttled into every other role, when they look nothing like the majority of black women. Gabourey and Whoopi are a lot closer, than Halle and Beyonce. So why shouldn’t Gabourey play the lead in a film and EXPECT the support of other black women? Yes…I know, the image of fat black women has been bastardized for profit by EVERYONE, yet we never truly ever get a sense of who these women are. Why squander the rare opportunity to watch one in her own story? Hers, may not be mine or yours, but at least Precious is no mammy, sassy commercial pitchman, or best girlfriend. That makes all the difference.

Precious-push-movie-02

2. Weak ’strong black women’ – The SBW facade is over. The whole world will know black women are imperfect and have feelings. Although we hate being stereotyped, we seem to uphold this image of the indestructible black woman who can take all kind of shit and keep it moving. I don’t know about y’all, but I’m not made out of genuine cow-hide. I cry a hell of a lot. I hurt. And I do appreciate portrayals of black women who are normal people coping with the pain of living. As a result, it humanizes me.

precious mari

3. Staying positive at all costs - The compulsive need to embrace ‘positive’ films seems strange to me. Films are about people struggling to solve their problems. Sometimes in vain. Black moviegoers seem content with artificial challenges…nothing too deep that it would cause us to think about our philosophical leanings, our deep pathologies, our unhealed slave-psychology. It’s much harder for films like PRECIOUS to see the light of day if we’re busy supporting fluff from the likes of Tyler Perry. ‘Staying positive’ as the antidote to decades of stereotypical portrayals has left us with too many disposable films which say nothing about black life.

Lars and I are on the same page…

September 18, 2009 at 9:50 am | In Lars Von Trier, Manderlay | Leave a Comment

I like seeing films alone, during the middle of the day, with the old folks, so I can avoid situations like this. Enjoy.

Top ’00s (2001): Baise-Moi

September 13, 2009 at 1:05 am | In BAISE-MOI, Year: 2001 films, top of the '00s | Leave a Comment

baise-moi 5

Seems quite normal…a road movie following the adventures of a duo running from the law. But this is no ordinary road trip. It’s one taken by a rape victim and a former prostitute hell-bent on revenge – through sex and violence. Thelma and Louise have nothing on Manu and Nadine (played by Rafaëlla Anderson and Karen Bach, real-life porn stars). It’s hard to imagine a female aggressor blessed with the unapologetic nature of a dude. Still, in BAISE-MOI, a french film written, directed and produced by Virginie Despentes (a retired-French-prostitute-turned-author) and Coralie Trinh Thi (former porn actress) – Manu and Nadine are shaped into impressive psycho-killers.

baise-moi 7

I think it’s difficult to accept women like Manu and Nadine. They certainly are not the norm. Women are interior, they’re vessels, they draw in. Women take their anger out on themselves. They wonder what they did wrong. They boo-hoo over their problems. Eat too much. Cut themselves. Develop anorexia. Question their validity. Become selfless martyrs. Whatever the pain, the punching bag will most likely stop with them. Women destroy themselves.

baise-moi 2

Men, on the other hand are warriors…they thrust outward…toward. Men are usually more externally-focused and tend to take their rage out on their nearest targets. A wall may get punched, or worse…a girlfriend, a passer-by, a stranger, may get assaulted, raped, or killed. Men simply destroy.

It just so happens it is easier to destroy women.

If somehow the world flipped and women begun reacting to pain like men…physically, instead of emotionally…, a whole lot of men would be in deep-shit trouble. One could only imagine how dangerous women might be if the roles were reversed. After all, laws are made to protect people from physical harm, but there are no similar ones to protect from emotional harm. Emotional wounds mean nothing in a patriarchal world. It makes perfect sense these women express their pain in ways that are universally accepted.

baise-moi 4

There is nothing aesthetically beautiful or erotic about BAISE-MOI. This film makes human sexuality ugly…an absolute mess, a horror movie, not based in any CGI theatrics, but the gritty, grainy, raw reality of human-horror…from a gaping vagina that was just raped to an anal invasion via firearm. If these bitches can’t be satisfied they’ll either blow your brains out or penetrate you THEN blow your brains out. Take your pick. This film can also pat itself on the back for a spectacular body count, matched only by the typical American blockbuster. I also found it interesting that BAISE-MOI got banned in France…(FRANCE!!!) of all places. Have fun trying to obtain a copy of it. And for the inspired-mess that it is, BAISE-MOI earned my top spot in 2001 (Top of the ’00s).

met my favorite director and all I got was…

September 11, 2009 at 6:08 pm | In A Swedish Love Story, MOMA, Roy Andersson, Songs from the Second Floor | Leave a Comment

…this
youthelivingposter
…fabulous 20×40 YOU, THE LIVING movie poster…or rather posters, which I will promptly sell on ebay. Seemed no one wanted them. But in time they will…

Anyway I finally met the brilliant Roy Andersson at MOMA’s Roy Andersson Retrospective. He was there to present A SWEDISH LOVE STORY (1970), a film never distributed in the US.

Swedish Love Story
I can see why. The two leads seemed to be preteens smoking, drinking, and having sex, even though they were supposedly 14. To my eyes, they looked about 11. Still, the film is downright sweet and conventional in comparison to his surrealistic masterpieces, 30 years later.

I had another opportunity to see SONGS on a big screen, which is how it is best appreciated. The long depth-of-field in a typical Andersson film (post 2000), usually has me following some undiscovered character lurking in the background, previously missed in my other 10,000 viewings of his absurdist films.

secondfloor

Another interesting tidbit…the SONGS title refers to a storyline of an employee who worked on a second floor of an office building. He cut those scenes but kept the title, which has nothing to do with the rest of the film.